A Brush With the Far Side

Small world – strange place…  So the other day I left a couple of messages on someone’s voice mail wanting some info about this or that.  The recording was one of those monotone/flat affect sort of messages that come standard with your phone and one that most people rush to change.  I thought it was odd considering the person I was trying to reach is one of those people who records cutsie messages with music in the background.  I got a call back the next day while working my garage/shop that went as follows:

Ring… Ring…

Me: Hello

Caller: Hi this is Gary Larson and you left a couple of messages on our phone the last few days looking for ______.

Me: Uhh, yeah, sorry I must have had the wrong num…, wait, uhh – Gary Larson – as in THE Gary Larson?!

Caller: Well, there are a number of THE Gary Larson’s, but yes…

Me: Ummm, oh….  Yeah sorry, I didn’t mean to bug you.  I will check the number and make sure to call the uhh right one from now on, sir.

Caller: Ok, great.  Have a good day, bye…

Me: …………..

Now, I am someone who has a comeback for everything.  As a child I was king of the ‘dozens (playground ‘Yo Mamma is so… ‘ matches) and I am almost never at a loss for words – sometimes to my own detriment…  I pride myself on my ability to deliver a polished opinion/thought/answer on command and under stress.  As one can tell from the transcript above, I failed miserably to seize the opportunity that serendipity dropped in my lap and tell an amazing artist how much I love his work and that at the very instant he called there was one of his comics in view, freshly pinned to the right of the shop door.  No, no, instead I sounded like I had just put down the 3’ bong and paused my video game in my parent’s basement before answering his call.  So much for my personal power of wit, self-control, verbal ability, and mental agility… dumbass…….