Computer gone… Life harder

Dear thieving bastard;

While I can understand a want/need in life and lacking the sources to make it happen – I really can: I once lived in a shack on the edge of an alligator and snake infested swamp with no job, no car, an absent partner, a negative bank balance, three cans of chili to eat, and a crying baby. I can see how my computer just sitting out in the open, behind my locked hotel room door, could be tempting for you. If you stole my computer to feed your children or buy medicine for a loved one, then please ignore the rest of this letter and may God hold you and keep you. I pray that my laptop, or the proceeds from its sale, is the catalyst, the first step, to a better life.

If that is not the case and you jacked my shit because you wanted a quick buck, well then… I hope that this theft is part of a life of petty crime that will eventually lead you to a small cell in a damp prison with a very large cell-mate that has aggressively amorous intentions for the part of your anatomy that you are currently sitting on. I wish this from the bottom of my deep dark soul due to the headache, frustration and lost time/effort you have caused me. Almost two months of work -12 hour days – gone. Hours that will be spent filling out paperwork, the finger wagging disapproval from the powers that be and my J-O-B. You son of a bitch…

Sincerely yours,
Matt Talley